Romance, Royalty, and Reality

With all the talk about Princess Dianna's legacy, truly her greatest contribution to the world rests in her two sons and, in particular, the grounding she gave them in what we call real life.

Along with her Christian upbringing, perhaps Dianna learned from Buddha, who was born a prince and was so sheltered from reality that when he finally snuck off the palace grounds to explore the real world, he discovered (to his deep consternation)poverty, illness and death. A major religion evolved from his dramatic awakening.

Dianna was, in her day, quick to become the beautiful princess envied by none who observed her with a keen eye. A loveless marriage, overpowering in-laws who did not accept or approve of her, and the public humiliation of ongoing blatant betrayal by Charles all moved her along the path that molded her into a devoted mother determined to raise her boys her way -- as best she could. She also became a doer of good deeds in terms of the hundreds of charities she supported by her actions, not mere words. The world is indeed a better place for her existence.

Now there is Kate, who is dearly and obviously loved truly by her Prince Charming... the manifestation of his mother's dreams for him. I love that William gave her Dianna's engagement ring. What an honor for her, and for him a gesture with deep meaning. It seems that the high price paid by Dianne covered lessons actually learned by the monarchy, which allowed William to live in the real (albeit privileged) world, where he is marrying for love after earning a university degree, serving in the military complete with the risks of a rescue pilot,and sowing his fair share of wild oats. Kate's compassionate understanding of his struggles with his inescapable position in life speak volumes about her own character.

This prince and princess have had the best and the worst of examples set for them by their parents' marriages. Charles and Dianna's relationship has taught them how not to do it. Kate's commoner parents have offered inspiration and hope. William and Kate have not turned a blind eye or deaf ear, and their relationship has passed the test of time. They have both deep emotion and high intelligence going for them -- plus what Dianna never had: the freedom to be themselves and to reject the stuffy and senseless traditions that history has taught us have reaped misery for so many. This prince and princess face the future forewarned and forearmed.

The rest of us can benefit by the incredible potential and dare I say natural inclination these two have to follow in Dianna's footsteps, together using their position in life to make the world a better place. My hope for them is that they will continue on the path, the high road if you will, they have chosen for themselves, balancing their personal and private lives on the same tightrope that tripped and tethered Dianne, then took her life.

There is no such thing as too much publicity when it comes to these two, although my read on this is that William will take the bull (pun intended) by the horns when it comes to the media, to do what Charles did not -- protect the love of his life with fierceness and ferocity, as well as live his life and someday rule his country with backbone as well as dignity.

I don't care what Kate's wedding dress looks like or how much the event is costing. I care about their happiness. They've earned it, they deserve it, they exude it and the rest of us can and should let it wash over us like soft, foamy waves. Those of us who choose to can love their love and let our admiration for them inspire us to greater heights.

Some of What I Learned in 2010 (So Far)

That no matter how hard you try, you’ll never be able to be in more than one place at a time.

That no matter how careful you are, there will always be someone who takes what you say or do the wrong way.

That expecting life to make sense makes no sense at all.

That something as fleeting as a sigh, a word, glance, a touch, can change your life forever. For better or worse.

That sinking down is easier, faster, and more common than rising up.

That the hardest part of finishing a job is starting it.

That even though animals can’t put words to it, they often know more about loyalty than humans.

That time doesn’t heal all wounds, but you can decide to let an injury stop you in your tracks, or simply slow you down.

That we should never make a promise if keeping it depends on someone else’s behavior.

That letting go is sometimes harder than holding on.

That it’s easier for older people to understand young people than for young people to understand their elders.

That sometimes the fastest way to make someone really angry is to be right.

That if you want a hug from someone sometimes you just gotta give them one.

That having a hero in your life is important, even though all hero worship is largely fantasy.

That love has more to do with what another person needs, than what you have to offer.

That sometimes it helps to clear things up, but sometimes it’s best to let things be blurry. The trick is knowing when to do what.

That fixing something doesn’t always mean it’s going to stay fixed. Sometimes you have to fix it over and over and over again.

That “Knowledge is power” and “Ignorance is bliss” are separate but equal truths.

That certainty is stupidity dressed up in party clothes. Wisdom is never being sure of anything.

That too much of a good thing can be bad, but sometimes too much of a bad thing is pretty good too.